Suicune and Lugia have always been role models for myself. I have always taken after their strength and worked hard to be fair and just like them. In hard times, they have both been great friends to me. More so, even. Sil has been an older sister to me for a long time now, and Fox has always been someone I cared for greatly, leaning on each other in times of desperation, even when not able to be near each other.
I knew their identities from my time as an Admin alongside them, and they have both done painful and beautiful things. I never regret my time with them and I cherish the memories of us back in the day.
I am not an Admin, and I've always been known, so this isn't some huge thing really. Most members already know, I'm sure, ad mods/past staff know well who I am.
I have gone through hard times in my life, both recently and when I was new to staff. I have always done my very best to follow the amazing examples in Fox ad Sil, not just Suicune and Lugia. I looked up to them all as individuals, and I loved them all for long before and after knowing the truth.
When Mew came out, I was extremely upset. I nearly had a anxiety attack, I could not breathe. I have always depended on other people to look up to and Zapdos was my crutch long since I joined Mod and unchanged even when I stepped down and left EJ. He was someone strong, who did the hard things alongside Suicune and Lugia, as well as screwed around in chat with the members and people he loves. He made me laugh, forced me to be happy, when I would enter chat sobbing. He brought my mood up and spirits became higher when I could not breathe after a day of anxiety attacks back in school. He's made me cry more than any one person I know, and all in joy, when I am laughing so hard I can not get air in my lungs. He has been someone people looked up to, though I only understood why when I stepped back and thought of him as him and not as me. Mew has told me this countless times. But I have low self esteem, and I loathe myself at times.
But I am stronger now. I will never stop being me and I won't eve lose the Zapdos inside. I am coming out as well in public, to let you all know this is Ricxs, Vincent, and I do not regret a damn thing I have done in my time as him. I have helped so many of you, and I will never stop striving to in time.